Have you ever lost someone very important to you? How did you feel? I felt horrible when my grandma died. It was a miserable day for me and my family. My dad was getting calls from my family late into the night; when he woke up it was about four o’clock. He then checked his phone and saw that there were a lot of missed calls. Then, when he called the family back, they notified him that my grandma had died, and my dad woke up my mom and told her.
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I was sleeping at the time, but I heard someone crying next to me and I immediately woke up and saw my mom crying. “Amma, why are you crying?” I asked her.
“It's nothing, just go back to sleep,” she replied.
“Amma, tell me why you are crying?” I questioned again.
“Your grandma, she is not with us anymore,” she finally said. For a second I didn’t understand what my mom was saying, what is my mom talking about I thought, but when I eventually started to understand, I began crying, crying so much that it would fill up a whole lake. Why? Why would this happen? Why should this happen? God why would you do this to me? I shouted in my head, it was very hard for me to process that my grandma was actually gone. We stayed up the whole night trying to get tickets to go to India, but it was Covid time so we couldn’t get last minute tickets. Because we couldn’t get tickets we just watched my grandma’s funeral from a video call, and I saw my grandma, but it was scary for me not seeing my grandma alive, so I immediately turned away and couldn’t watch the rest.
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It was about eight o’clock in the morning after the funeral and the clouds seemed very dull and dark. My parents were just talking about when we could go to India and stuff like that, but when they said that “grandma lived a great life” this caught my attention. I had thought that but I didn’t dare to bring it up. I didn’t like what my parents had said. Of course my grandma lived a great life! But whenever someone dies, adults always say that to accept the person's death and move on. I know adults have to be strong and everything, but why can’t they just admit that they were sad? My parents also said that “it was also great that grandma came to America” which was true and when my grandma did come to America I felt happy and I wished she just stayed with us here.
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Whenever my grandma came to America we all went on vacation to Florida, my cousin sisters came as well. That was the last I went on vacation with my grandma. We went on a lot of rides. I even drove her around on the wheel chair scooter thing. I was so happy that I was with her. This moment made me very happy and I thought that she would be with me forever so tried to cherish every single moment I had with my grandma. I never thought about what would happen if she passed away. I did think about it once or twice, but I turned down the thought of bad things happening because it was too scary for me.
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she could do is come here for a visit and nothing else for one thing, it was too cold here for my grandma to stay and also all of her family except for us was in India. I always thought that I didn’t cherish the time I had with my grandma. I took her for granted many times and because of this, after she had passed away, I cried at random times. I remembered a precious time with my grandma that I had, but I hid it from my parents because I didn’t want them to see me crying. I also didn’t want my parents to worry too much about me because I was crying, and I cried many, many times. Even worse, I kept regretting that I didn’t know that my mom had called my grandma the night before she died, so I wasn’t able to talk to her that day. I used to talk to my grandma every single night before I went to bed, but that one day I didn’t because I didn’t know my mom had called her.
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I had remembered a time I took my grandma for granted. The time I took my grandma for granted was during the summer. It was lunchtime and my parents had gone somewhere outside, so it was just me and my grandma at home. Because my parents weren’t at home they weren’t there to give me food or tell me not to stress my grandma (even though I wasn’t actually stressing her). I was hungry and my grandma was giving me food, but it was too cold so she had to go back to the kitchen and heat it up, when it was heated my grandma gave to me and sat down, then I the picky eater that I am, had to say that I didn’t want the food, so my grandma had to get up and prepare another type of food for me, and I DIDN’T EVEN SAY THANK YOU!!
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A year after my grandma died we went to India to redo the funeral as a memorial service for my grandma. We invited everyone from our family and it was good to see everyone in person after Covid. Except for one very important person: my grandma. In the memorial service they had put a slide show showing all the pictures of my grandma and a few of them were from when she came to America. I was happy to see that she was smiling in a few of them.
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It was a very happy and sad day for me but it was mostly full of sorrow. Even though I didn’t actually cry I was very miserable inside. I learned from this sad experience that not everything lasts forever, so I cherished the time I have in my life. When my grandma died I wished I was with her for a longer time, I wished I was with her when she died, and I really wished I was at her funeral.
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